It’s essential to confront and embrace your childhood to live a fulfilled life.

It’s essential to confront and embrace your childhood to live a fulfilled life.

This is especially relevant if you’re seeking a fulfilling intimate relationship.

Do you think that because you’re in your 30s, 40s or 50s and in an adult body that you’ve left your childhood behind? 

Physically you’re presenting as an adult…but the truth is that psycho-emotionally your childhood is far from behind you. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you’re better off knowing the truth that the child you were is living on within you. Everything you ever experienced as a child is held in your nervous system AND unconsciously influencing your decisions, relationships, career, confidence up until now…unless you’ve done deep personal development work.

You’re probably familiar with Russian dolls. 

When you open the larger sized doll you find a smaller doll, and inside of that small doll is an even smaller one and so on. 

Similarly, within your adult body, there is a younger version of you…an even younger one…and younger still…all the way back to your conception. Not physically as with the Russian doll, but emotionally and psychologically.

Over the past 10 years in my coaching practice,  I haven’t met a single client whose life hasn’t been impacted by their childhood in one way or another. 

What everyone needs to know:

  • Trust is essential in every area of your life. You need a certain level of trust in yourself to be able to make powerful decisions and the right choices. You need to be capable of trusting the opposite gender to form healthy relationships, and the same gender for supportive friendships. You need to be able to trust yourself enough to go after what you want with ease.

And even though TRUST as a capacity and a quality is so important, very few of us know that it’s built up in the first few years of our lives, especially in the first year.

The capacity to trust was ingrained into your nervous system and cells, based on how reliable and predictable your parents were, and how much they trusted themselves.

If you find it challenging  to trust your body, your gut feeling, your dreams, your intuition – looking more deeply into your childhood will support you to make fundamental changes. 

  • Having a purpose or a dream you feel inspired by is another key aspect to living a fulfilled life. Many men feel lost and are living without clear direction, because they lack ‘purpose’. A man who doesn’t know and is not living up to his purpose, can’t fully commit to a romantic relationship. Women are attracted to men who are purposeful, driven and motivated. They feel as though they can look up to this type of man because they can lead. If a man can lead in his own life, he will be able to lead in relationships as well. And we women, we desire men to take the lead…especially in relationships.

It will probably come as no surprise to you that this sense of having a purpose and a vision for your future is formed in childhood as well. This will have been created as early as between the ages of 3 and 6 through role play, initiating games, playing with other kids, being supported vs. criticised by your parents for ideas, visions and dreams that you learned to appreciate and follow – or the opposite may have happened where you were taught to suppress, question or disregard your ideas.  If you’re lacking purpose and feeling lost, you need to go back to the roots of this conditioning, and reactivate your capacity to dream and teach yourself to trust those dreams. 

Stay tuned for future posts where I will be sharing more on the impact our childhoods have on us as adults, especially when it comes to intuition, fear of intimacy and disconnection between our sexuality and our hearts. 

I’d love to hear from you in the comments which topics you’d most like to learn more about.

 And if you’re interested in diving deeper into your childhood and transforming unhelpful patterns you’ve carried into adulthood, you can find out more about my programs on my website: 

https://chandrapolyak.com/

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