PART 2 – Love can heal everything…however, are you available for that kind of love?
The other day I posted about how living with a wounded heart can actually prevent someone from attracting THE love.
I also mentioned that the variations are many, as the way of going about and around hurt and wound and love depends on the personal character, history, coping mechanism.
And here are some other ways to block out love:
putting the partner under test, like never ending tests…one after the other…trying to get the prove of his/her certainty…but the tests are never enough, you are never ‘convinced’ that he/she is into you.
This testing is again an unconscious desire to feel safe, to be sure if the relating is safe for you to get engaged with your heart as well.
But even your partner made up to the test(s), your wounded heart can’t feel safe (enough) due previous hurt…can’t soften fully, receive deeply
getting involved with someone…and keeping it as a surface level…looking for excuses or reasons why this person isn’t the right one on the long term, still sticking around…
dating multiple people at the same time and not giving and taking the chance to go deep with one person. Not considering that to have a satisfyingly intimate relationship needs time, attention, commitment and nurturing each other – which is to be honest quite impossible to do when you are involved with multiple people…however it is a good excuse isn’t it?
keeping the connection with the friends with benefits category, not letting it to deepen…chicken out when it can get ‘too’ serious’ or committed with an excuse.
Taking comfort in being with someone, and avoiding commitment by telling yourself and the other one the story that ‘we are just friends’
Any of these ways are tactics to keep you heart from potential heart.
Still having a sort of experience of love; trying to meet you basic needs for connection, intimacy, sex, companionship…
Where is this leading attitude leading you…if anywhere?
Are you really getting what you need? (or just some kind of substitute?
Which tactic have you been following?